August article for the Parents centre newsletter
I must admit the only reason I picked up this book was because of its very catchy title and boy am I glad I did. This book is written by Oliver James a clinical child psychologist and well known author (he also wrote Alluenza and How they F*** you up). As a parent I constantly worry if am I doing the right thing for my child. I am super aware that everything I do now will shape and affect my son for LIFE! That’s a huge responsibility so I’m a strong believer in reading to try to be the best mum I can.
How not to f*** them up basically indentifies three different types of mothers; the hugger – she might be a stay at home mum who loves to be in physical contact with their child – very touchy feely type of mum; the organiser – a mum who may go back to work early on, likes to have structure and routine and the fleximum; who basically swings between being a hugger and an organiser which can also change with different children. James is VERY unjudgemental of each of the mothering styles; he describes all the advantages and disadvantages of each style and you can pick and choose what suits your family best. He has some great tips on dealing with under threes to suit all different lifestyle choices. This book is factual, funny and scarily accurately as he describes each of the mothers – there were many moments when I went oh look there I am! Oh my I do that! I believe this book will help me be a better mother and I highly recommend it to everyone.